Social Media Scamscritical

The Romance Scam That Cost a Widow £40,000

A widow in her 60s was targeted on a bereavement support Facebook group and developed what she believed was a genuine relationship — over 14 months she was defrauded of £40,000.

Individual victim (UK)·2022·2 min read

Attack Chain

Victim targeted in bereavement group

Months of relationship building

Small money requests escalate over time

Emotional manipulation prevents victim questioning

1
Victim targeted in bereavement group
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Months of relationship building
3
Small money requests escalate over time
4
Emotional manipulation prevents victim questioning

Background

Following the death of her husband, a retired nurse joined a Facebook bereavement support group. In the group she was contacted by a man claiming to be a widowed civil engineer working on a construction contract abroad. Over several months they exchanged hundreds of messages and video calls (which she later discovered were deepfakes or pre-recorded footage of a real person).

The Attack

After several months of building emotional intimacy, the requests for money began. Initially small — a few hundred pounds to cover an emergency medical bill. Then progressively larger amounts: equipment seized by customs, a business opportunity he wanted to share with her, tax to be paid before he could transfer a large sum he claimed was coming to her. Each time she hesitated, he reaffirmed his love and their future together.

Response

Her adult daughter eventually grew suspicious and persuaded her to contact the real person whose photos had been used. He confirmed his identity had been stolen for scams. Police were notified, an Action Fraud report was filed. The bank could not recover funds as they had been sent willingly over time.

Outcome

The victim lost £40,000 over 14 months — a significant portion of her savings. Beyond the financial loss, the emotional betrayal was described by her as worse than the money. She required counselling and became an ambassador for romance fraud awareness.

Key Takeaways

Be very wary of any online relationship where the person can never meet in person and always has a reason for needing money
Reverse image search any profile photo using Google Images or TinEye — stolen photos of real people are a common giveaway
Romance scammers specifically target recently bereaved or divorced people on grief and dating platforms
Never send money to someone you have not met in person, regardless of how genuine the relationship feels
Talk to a trusted friend or family member before sending any significant sum of money to someone you've only met online

How to Prevent This

All guides

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Reverse image search profile photos to spot fake accounts

Romance scammers and investment fraudsters almost always use stolen photos of real, attractive people as their profile picture. The real person usually has no idea their photos are being used. Reverse image searching a profile photo takes about 30 seconds and can immediately reveal whether the image has been stolen from somewhere else on the internet. How to do it: - On desktop: Right-click the profile photo → Search image with Google Lens - On iPhone: Press and hold the image, select "Search with Google" - Or: Go to images.google.com and drag the image into the search box - Alternatively, use TinEye.com — specifically designed for reverse image search If the search reveals the same photo appearing on multiple different accounts with different names, or on a modelling site or someone's genuine personal page, the account using it is fake. This is especially useful when someone you've only met online asks you to move a relationship forward quickly, shares a particularly attractive photo, or is based abroad and can never meet in person.

See: The Romance Scam That Cost a Widow £40,000Social Media Safety

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